bentflame ([personal profile] bentflame) wrote2008-08-29 03:33 pm

(no subject)

{LOL LOCKFAIL} She loves me.

...

...

Hm.

I will have to consider this idea a bit more, it seems. It's difficult too... expel from my thoughts at times. Thankfully it hasn't distracted me from my duties, but occasionally during my downtime it'll just... "hit me", I suppose one would say. It's always quite unexpected, though not entirely... unpleasant. It's a... well. It's a nice thought, really.

One thing that I unfortunately am having a bit of trouble with is remembering that it all could dissipate at any moment, without any warning. The first time I was unprepared, which was a mistake- it caused me to react in a very embarrassing and wholly unacceptable manner. I had made similar slip-ups in the past, but none of that magnitude- and I am quite unhappy that it went that far before I fully realized what I was doing. Have I really grown so... hm.

... Despite this, I truly do care for her. Love her. Very much. It's almost... more emotion than I know what to do with, really; certainly much more than I am used to experiencing. But I must learn to keep the weakness- the additional weakness; the "weird" sort of weakness- out of the picture. {/LOL LOCKFAIL}

I will be turning fifteen not so long from now. Originally, my goal was to have the Avatar captured and destroyed by my birthday, but that was before we made plans to wait for the comet to arrive before launching a full-scale attack. Ideally I would have liked to be crowned Fire Lord beforehand, as well, but I am willing to wait just a little bit longer.

I have never really understood the purpose of birthdays- that is, making such a big deal out of them. I will be of marrying age at sixteen, so doubtless Father is going to start spending quite a bit more time this year searching for a suitable match for me. I can only hope that he'll leave me out of it as much as possible; the entire process bores me.

Additionally- for anyone who may have business with me to attend to, I will most likely be spending much of tomorrow at the royal hot springs, and will therefore be unreachable.

OOC: That last note is my way of saying that I'm moving into my dorm tomorrow and probably won't have time to obsessively check my email the way I normally do. ;)

Re: 2/2

[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-30 12:08 am (UTC)(link)
And you really want to get married?

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-30 02:10 am (UTC)(link)
Well, I'll need to, of course. I wouldn't say that I want to.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 12:34 am (UTC)(link)
I thought that no one could tell you what you can or can't do. If you don't want to get married, don't get married.

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 12:46 am (UTC)(link)
It's not a matter of someone telling me that I have to- I'll need to produce an heir if I want to keep the line going, and keep the throne in my family's control. It's just common sense.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
You can to all that when you're ...like 18, there's no need to get married that young.

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 01:57 am (UTC)(link)
Why on earth would I wait until I was eighteen? It would be counterproductive.

I'm not getting married young at all.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 07:54 pm (UTC)(link)
So, you just want to get married young to have a bunch of kids because that's the tradition in the fire Nation?

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 09:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Only one will be necessary, hopefully. And it's not because of tradition.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 09:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Do you really see yourself as a mother, Azula?

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 09:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Of course not- I'm not going to raise the child myself; there will be servants to do that sort of thing. Though I'll over see its training, of course.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 09:21 pm (UTC)(link)
You can't be serious, that's not the correct way to rise a child.

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 09:22 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't believe it is your place to say.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 09:25 pm (UTC)(link)
It's not just my opinion, it's a fact.

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 09:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, you're certainly confident, aren't you?

Stay out of my business.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 09:57 pm (UTC)(link)
You don't even know what I'm talking about, don't you?

Your brother is married?

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 10:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Not in the slightest. Care to enlighten me?

No.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 10:37 pm (UTC)(link)
No. If you're so smart, try to understand it.

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 10:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Not understanding your idiotic insinuations hardly says anything about my intelligence.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 11:54 pm (UTC)(link)
What intelligence? You can't even remember the easiest thing princess

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-08-31 11:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, please. The fact that I didn't immediately recall a throwaway conversation of you only proves how unimportant speaking with you is.

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-09-01 12:24 am (UTC)(link)
Keep telling yourself that. The truth is, you can't keep your promises. And you talk about honor...

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[identity profile] peoplesprincess.livejournal.com 2008-09-01 12:43 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, really? And when did I say that I wasn't going to keep my word?

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[identity profile] sassygirlsrock.livejournal.com 2008-09-01 12:51 am (UTC)(link)
You act dumb just to not to do something you don't want to do, even if you promised to do it.

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